Episode Transcript
[00:00:38] Speaker A: Hello everyone, and welcome back for episode 66 of the Cracked Die podcast. My name is Matt. I play twintallon on the show. This is not my normal microphone. We have another good one for you this week. Exciting. But first, have you seen Absalom in order? It's our Twitch show this Saturday on Twitch at Twitch TV, crackeddy. We do it every three weeks for 3 hours, and if you haven't seen one, why not try it this weekend? We're still in the first book. You can figure out who the heck the characters are along with the rest of us. Additionally, we are approaching the end of book two of Age of Ashes in this very podcast. I think we probably have six or 700 episodes left, but Shawn seems to think it's going to happen sooner than that. And we would love to have your questions about this book, whether it be some issue you feel was unresolved throughout this adventure, or questions about a character we met, or questions about one of the PCs that you're curious about. So please get us your questions either via email or Twitter or whatever the kids are using now. I assume TikTok videos and Snapchat filters. If you are a Patreon member, you can get your questions to us via our discord server. That's right. If you are not a Patreon member, you're missing out on titillating conversations with one another and also sometimes with us. For just $5, you can create a critical hit, or more likely, a critical failure card for use on both of the shows. With the podcast and the Twitch show, you will also get access to our discord server where you can meet other people who also like this podcast and also chat with us. So there's that. In any case, I'm going to get my cane and let you get back to the episode. Episode 66 round and round.
[00:02:43] Speaker B: Welcome to the 66th episode of the Crack Die podcast. Woo hoo.
[00:02:48] Speaker C: Hooray.
[00:02:49] Speaker D: Three more to the super special one.
[00:02:52] Speaker A: Yeah, you said we were gonna do.
[00:02:53] Speaker C: Something special for that episode.
[00:02:55] Speaker E: Nice one.
[00:02:57] Speaker C: Yes, Sean, you did say you're gonna do something fun for that episode. You said it.
[00:03:02] Speaker B: I know.
[00:03:03] Speaker C: 59Th episode surprise.
[00:03:05] Speaker E: We're all gonna play our characters in monster hearts.
[00:03:10] Speaker B: Please, Sean is actually a good idea.
[00:03:13] Speaker E: Maybe I should do that.
[00:03:15] Speaker B: Yeah, maybe I'll just do the entire nice episode ants list. I don't know.
[00:03:20] Speaker D: Oh, oh.
[00:03:21] Speaker E: I mean, nobody would know that. You and I don't even record in the same room.
[00:03:24] Speaker B: It's true.
[00:03:24] Speaker E: You could be Donald ducking it right now. No one would know.
[00:03:27] Speaker B: I mean, it wouldn't yeah, I was gonna say it wouldn't make a big change from how I've been remote recording as it is. But anyway, you're welcome for that lovely.
[00:03:35] Speaker E: Insight into our lives from Schnurz.
[00:03:38] Speaker C: Get back here, Rob.
[00:03:39] Speaker B: Why do we have no more listeners?
Where'd everyone go? Why are download numbers so low now? Well, let's.
[00:03:46] Speaker E: Let's.
[00:03:47] Speaker B: Oh, let's see.
[00:03:47] Speaker E: Brianna smash some shit.
[00:03:49] Speaker C: I'm excited and.
[00:03:50] Speaker D: Yeah, well, thank you.
[00:03:51] Speaker B: Hang on.
[00:03:51] Speaker E: I don't know.
[00:03:52] Speaker B: Hang on. Before we get into Brianna, you know, smacking some stuff, I wanted to let you guys know something really neat about our show. Okay.
[00:04:06] Speaker C: Is it that we have a patreon?
[00:04:07] Speaker B: Well, I hope people know we have a patreon. Actually, I know people know we have a patreon.
[00:04:12] Speaker C: Is it the twitch show every third Saturday on twitch.com.
[00:04:16] Speaker E: Crack day?
[00:04:18] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:04:18] Speaker C: Is that what.
[00:04:19] Speaker B: No, I think this is even neater than both of those. Although you should check both of those out. It's the fact that in the last 30 days, we were ranked the 49th most popular podcast in the UK in the gaming category.
[00:04:36] Speaker E: That's awesome.
[00:04:37] Speaker C: Thanks. UK?
[00:04:38] Speaker E: Yeah, yeah.
[00:04:40] Speaker B: Like, not top 200, not top 100, top 50. Okay. In the United Kingdom. So thank you to everyone who listens.
[00:04:51] Speaker E: To us in the UK.
[00:04:52] Speaker B: Who listens in the UK.
[00:04:54] Speaker C: And everywhere else.
[00:04:55] Speaker B: Well, everywhere else as well. Definitely everywhere else as well. But really, really cool to see that. So, you know, keep telling your friends about this. Yeah, yeah.
[00:05:09] Speaker C: And if you're in the UK, thank you very much for helping us get this far and we hope that you can push us all the way up in the top ten. If you're not in the UK, are you gonna let the people in the UK beat you? Like, really?
[00:05:19] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:05:21] Speaker C: I mean, like, come on, America, what do we got to do?
[00:05:24] Speaker E: Are we starting an unofficial contest to see who can get us into the top ten quickest? Yes, right now.
[00:05:32] Speaker C: We'll worry about that once it happens.
[00:05:36] Speaker B: That being said, for all of 2020, the year that was, we peaked in the United States in the top 60 podcasts in October.
[00:05:47] Speaker F: Nice.
[00:05:48] Speaker B: For some reason, in October, everyone in the US loved us. Don't know why.
[00:05:54] Speaker E: Awesome.
[00:05:55] Speaker B: But they did. So thank you. Thank you. In October and then for the year. For the whole year of 2020, across all countries, we were 195 in the gaming podcasts. Okay, that's awesome.
[00:06:11] Speaker C: What do we do? We know how many there are?
[00:06:13] Speaker B: Thousands. Cause I pulled up the game. Anything that has the games tag in podcasts. And there were easily two to 3000, if not more, that I.
[00:06:22] Speaker C: So we're still in, like, the top 10%.
[00:06:24] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:06:25] Speaker E: That's incredible. Like, thanks to all of our listeners.
[00:06:27] Speaker B: I have to.
[00:06:28] Speaker E: Amazing.
[00:06:28] Speaker B: Yes. The reason I'm saying numbers like this and bringing them up is just. Thank you. Like, I want to make sure we're super, super excited about these numbers. And, you know, we started this, like.
[00:06:42] Speaker E: A year ish ago, and to know that, I mean, we're here in that time is amazing. So thanks to all of our listeners. We love each and every one of you. Thanks to our, like, we have seven or eight Patreon patrons. Thank you guys, too. You guys are amazing.
[00:06:58] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:06:59] Speaker D: Eight currently. Should we. Should we list them off just to start the year off right?
[00:07:03] Speaker B: I mean, I think we should.
[00:07:05] Speaker D: All right. So, yes, if you are wanting to join our Patreon, you will also have exclusive discord roles and whatnot, and you can come and hang out with us there.
[00:07:16] Speaker E: Shout out to beard who recently logged on to that. Awesome. Great to have you on the community.
[00:07:23] Speaker B: The Patreon list. Again, more shout outs for people, because these lovely folks deserve it. Jacob. Mike. Cassandra. Doombeard. Jeremy. David.
Anwar.
[00:07:40] Speaker C: What?
[00:07:41] Speaker B: I know Anwar. Even though he is no longer at the table with us, he is still supporting us. And. No, that is super sweet. Yeah.
[00:07:50] Speaker C: Thanks, Edward.
[00:07:51] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:07:51] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:07:52] Speaker B: And Shaka. S h a K a. Shaka. Okay, good.
I'm so good at names. I just wanted to make sure I didn't.
[00:08:01] Speaker E: I mean, if they listen, they're one aware.
[00:08:04] Speaker B: Yeah. Renooly Rinali. Potato, potato. What was that?
[00:08:09] Speaker C: God's name? The God of doors. What was that?
[00:08:11] Speaker B: Oh, Alsetta.
I'm surprised.
[00:08:15] Speaker E: I'm surprised it wasn't just Alistair at one point.
[00:08:19] Speaker B: Estella. Stella. Yeah. So I just wanted to thank everyone again at the top of the show, everyone who listens, that they've helped us get to incredible heights in what Christine said. Little over a year. And that's incredible. And we can't thank you enough. I know 2020 was rough for most people. So to see things like that, to see numbers like that, it just really warms my cold, cold GM home.
[00:08:48] Speaker E: And if our podcast made your 2020 any better, we're real glad.
[00:08:52] Speaker B: Yes. Yes. We're glad we could help in some way.
[00:08:56] Speaker D: That's what made our 2020.
[00:08:58] Speaker B: Enough mushy stuff. Brianna, what are you doing? You got a. You got these monkey throwing rocks. At this point, who knows what he'll throw next turn. You just saw a bunch of monkeys and frogs that were running towards you get pulled into the water. They're now prone, lying there, this weird creature with tentacles that have mouths on the end of it pulled to the middle.
There's a dragon pillar still shooting weird beams at you.
[00:09:26] Speaker D: I feel like in general, even though Brianna is on a mission right now and trying not to think of, of everything that's happened over the past, what, 24, 48 hours?
[00:09:36] Speaker B: 24 is, if even that long, she's.
[00:09:39] Speaker D: Still a bit numb and not good with directions. She'll turn to twin Talon, who has been a very good tactical leader thus far. Be like, should I just keep throwing javelins then or should I try and jump in there and topple the pillar?
[00:09:55] Speaker C: The problem is if you jump down to topple the pillar, you're going to take damage, fall down, which means she's prone and kind of susceptible to attacks. And there are a bunch of them still in the pit. So I think at this point, javelins to that monkey boy over there is probably our best bet, at least for now.
[00:10:09] Speaker D: Well, I only have a few more left, so here we go. I will draw a javelin and I will throw. Oh, with a 33.
[00:10:19] Speaker B: That is a crit.
[00:10:21] Speaker D: Excellent.
[00:10:22] Speaker B: That's a natural 20, by the way, just if you're wanted to know.
[00:10:26] Speaker D: Excellent.
[00:10:27] Speaker B: So go ahead and draw a crit hit card which some of our patrons have added to.
[00:10:32] Speaker C: Are you a $5 patron? This could be your credit card.
[00:10:35] Speaker F: $5.
[00:10:36] Speaker D: So this one is called forearm piercing. The target drops one weapon it's holding chosen randomly by the GM.
[00:10:44] Speaker B: Well, do your double damage cause it isn't holding anything at this moment.
[00:10:48] Speaker C: And blade one d six bleed.
[00:10:51] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:10:52] Speaker C: Will be on its turn, but yes.
[00:10:53] Speaker D: So 16 damage.
[00:10:55] Speaker B: Oh, and bleed. All right.
[00:10:58] Speaker D: And that'll be my turn.
[00:10:59] Speaker B: So one of the churica that fell takes an action to stand up. Get up, stand up, step under. Yep. And then for free does a Churica monkey sigh.
Head starts to walk around or swim, I guess because it's in the water.
[00:11:21] Speaker C: Yeah, swimming's much slower.
[00:11:23] Speaker B: It is, isn't it?
[00:11:26] Speaker C: I think it's one quarter your speed.
[00:11:28] Speaker B: Yep. So quarter of 25 is five.
[00:11:33] Speaker C: No, but yeah, it rounds out.
[00:11:35] Speaker B: Yeah. Second action. Third action. Oof. Next is the other churica that fell in the water. He will also stand up from being prone and drowning in the water, I guess. And then he will move. That is his turn. Man, that really messed them up. The boggard that fell thankfully isn't in the water, although they have a swim. Speed will stand up and start to run. Another chirika will go. He is still up. Despite naif swords best efforts. This one did not fall off the edge and is running.
[00:12:14] Speaker F: Dang it.
[00:12:15] Speaker B: Now, twin Talon, it is your turn.
[00:12:17] Speaker C: I'd like to see how rude it is that chirk. God not to have fallen after knife. Sword, dark hole, Seagull teeth put in all that effort.
[00:12:24] Speaker D: That's right.
[00:12:25] Speaker C: Shame on him. Also, I am going to do the same thing I've done last couple turns and just shoot that. That chirik in the facial region.
[00:12:35] Speaker B: Okay, we'll try it.
[00:12:40] Speaker C: 28 hit.
[00:12:45] Speaker D: You try chomp.
[00:12:47] Speaker B: I was really willing it.
[00:12:50] Speaker D: I could tell, but it was not gonna happen.
[00:12:55] Speaker C: Minimum damage. Three damage.
[00:12:57] Speaker B: All right, I like that. All right, what's your next action?
[00:13:01] Speaker C: I'll do it again.
[00:13:02] Speaker B: Miss. Miss.
[00:13:06] Speaker C: 30.
[00:13:07] Speaker B: That'll hit minimum. Minimum.
[00:13:10] Speaker A: Four.
[00:13:11] Speaker C: Not minimum. Almost though.
[00:13:14] Speaker B: All right. Damage wise, it's still alive. You have one more action. Matt, you can shoot him again.
[00:13:19] Speaker C: Poop. It is unlikely that I can shoot him again.
[00:13:22] Speaker B: I mean, what's the worst that happens?
[00:13:24] Speaker C: I shoot myself in the face and kill myself?
[00:13:26] Speaker B: If you could do 53 damage, I'd like to see it.
[00:13:29] Speaker C: Not with the bow.
[00:13:31] Speaker B: Yeah, I was gonna say the bow and arrow.
[00:13:33] Speaker C: The only nice thing with the bow is you do get that deadly d ten so you get a little extra. But yeah. I'm just gonna skip my last action. I guess we aren't super close there, so. Yep, I'm good. Two arrows, seven damage.
I feel super gross that that's how much damage I did. Normally I do that as like, that's my bonus.
[00:13:58] Speaker B: Last poor twin Talon Boggard starts running back towards where he was before he got pulled off the edges.
[00:14:06] Speaker C: SWAT. I have a question about something. So one of those boggards tried to smack or almost smacked into the now not whatever it's called. Now.
[00:14:16] Speaker B: Yeah, now. Not now. Net.
[00:14:19] Speaker C: Now. Net. Uh, did it take offense to that? Does it mad at him?
[00:14:23] Speaker B: Well, it hasn't gone yet. Oh, I have. I should roll initiative for it. So, uh, maybe one rounds the corner finally. I feel like it's taken forever for them to like round a corner and finally get close to you.
[00:14:42] Speaker E: I mean, it's not like we've been hampering them from doing that now.
[00:14:46] Speaker D: No, not at all.
[00:14:49] Speaker B: The dragon pillar now goes boo. And one it will hit Brianna. Two it will hit dark hole. Knife. Sword. Seagull.
[00:14:59] Speaker D: Gol come on.
[00:15:01] Speaker B: One it does.
Give me. That's three times in a row. Now give me a. I know, right?
[00:15:11] Speaker F: It thinks I'm.
[00:15:12] Speaker B: Give me a will save.
[00:15:15] Speaker D: You're playing your part so convincingly.
26.
[00:15:20] Speaker B: All right. You're only stunned. One again. I can't seem to get like the good ones off on you guys.
[00:15:30] Speaker D: I'm super willful.
[00:15:31] Speaker B: I know. And that's why I'm trying to hit. Knife sword.
The now net that was almost hit sees some churica swimming by it.
And a tentacle lashes forward at one of them for a 35 that will critically hit.
And the tentacle does what type of damage?
[00:15:59] Speaker D: Tentacle says what?
[00:16:00] Speaker B: Piercing and chaotic. Nictin artery. Normal damage. The target takes two d six. Persistent bleed damage.
[00:16:09] Speaker D: Not too shabby. Note.
[00:16:12] Speaker B: Damage. Takes eleven points of normal damage and four points of chaotic damage. And then now that there's blood in the water because it's bleeding, it will snap its mighty jaws at it for a 26, which will hit.
[00:16:29] Speaker E: I like watching our enemies tear each other apart.
[00:16:32] Speaker B: It will do eleven points of regular damage and two points of chaotic damage.
[00:16:38] Speaker C: Good job. Seagull teeth.
[00:16:40] Speaker B: And it will go one more time with its tentacle. A 24 will hit it for 23 points of damage total.
[00:16:51] Speaker C: Who does this guy think he is? Me?
[00:16:55] Speaker E: No. He made three attacks.
[00:16:58] Speaker B: Two DX.
Wow.
[00:17:03] Speaker C: All right, all right. His third attack is a plus ten. Still.
[00:17:08] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:17:09] Speaker E: He's got an advantage there.
[00:17:11] Speaker C: Mine's plus six.
[00:17:12] Speaker B: So interesting enough, the churica is still alive.
[00:17:17] Speaker D: Ridiculous.
[00:17:18] Speaker B: All right. This churica that has, is it a bitter war with twin talon?
[00:17:23] Speaker C: Bleeds first.
[00:17:24] Speaker B: Oh, yes. Bleeds one d six. Right?
[00:17:27] Speaker C: Correct.
[00:17:28] Speaker B: Go ahead and roll that, Brianna.
[00:17:31] Speaker C: Cc.
[00:17:32] Speaker D: One moment.
Five.
[00:17:34] Speaker B: Five points of bleed damage.
[00:17:38] Speaker C: That's almost as much damage as my whole turn.
[00:17:40] Speaker B: Last turn. This Chirika scrounges around and pulls out a trident and will throw the trident at twin Talon.
[00:17:50] Speaker C: Where is it scrounging a trident from?
[00:17:53] Speaker F: That seems random.
[00:17:54] Speaker D: Don't worry about it.
[00:17:55] Speaker B: 33.
[00:17:56] Speaker C: Uh huh.
[00:17:57] Speaker B: So you take 15 points of trident damage to the face.
[00:18:02] Speaker C: Not cool. Not cool.
[00:18:04] Speaker B: And then it will move.
[00:18:06] Speaker D: I'm sorry, I can't liberate you.
[00:18:08] Speaker C: It's okay.
[00:18:09] Speaker B: That's its turn.
[00:18:11] Speaker F: Hmm. Well, it worked once.
[00:18:14] Speaker B: Well, hang on. It's not quite your turn yet. For you see another tentacle lash out of the water at the bleeding chirika, which rolls a natural 20. Wow.
[00:18:28] Speaker D: Hopefully.
[00:18:29] Speaker C: I thought there were two of those crocodile snake creatures in there.
[00:18:32] Speaker B: Perfect strike. Triple damage.
You see this churica disappear and just a red mist show up around the water where it was as another naonet shows up and then attacks. Things got range the other chirika.
[00:18:52] Speaker C: So last one I hit from 15ft away. Just so people at home.
[00:18:55] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:56] Speaker C: Understand. So it's got. It's got some reach on it, especially for a large creature.
[00:19:00] Speaker B: And then you see its tail swing out.
15 will miss, but not critically. So that's its turn. It moved and ate one and then tried to eat another one. Now it is your turn.
[00:19:16] Speaker F: Okay.
[00:19:17] Speaker B: Knife. Sword.
[00:19:18] Speaker F: Alright, I say let's do it again.
[00:19:23] Speaker C: Feel like you're just throwing these guys in the blender because then they have to run through these monsters.
Not that I have any problem with that.
[00:19:34] Speaker F: Yum, yum, yum, yum. Feed the fishies. Feed the fishies.
[00:19:40] Speaker B: They all fail. Two of them critically fail.
[00:19:44] Speaker C: That's. That's not all of them.
[00:19:46] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, I forgot to roll for.
[00:19:47] Speaker C: The now nets and the wiggle worm.
[00:19:50] Speaker B: Oh, the wiggle worm.
[00:19:51] Speaker C: Yeah, they succeed. They still move 5ft.
[00:19:54] Speaker B: Yeah, they move 5ft, which is not good. Oh, all right. The wiggle worm moves 30ft, which is exactly to the middle. This now net moves 5ft. This now net moves 5ft. And then the boggard failed first boggard failed. So it moves 15 and it falls, taking ten points of damage. The Chiricah regular failed. Right. DC is 20 514. Ten less. No, that's a critical fail. Moves 15ft and then bounces into the void worm. To that void worm needs to make another reflex save. Fails again. It's gonna take five points of damage. And then the other boggard critically failed to move and hits the churika. Churika makes a reflex save and makes it with a 15.
[00:20:52] Speaker C: So it takes one quarter of the damage. So it takes two.
[00:20:55] Speaker E: This falling damage. Chain reaction.
[00:20:58] Speaker B: All right, that's everyone. And you have one more action. Knife, sword.
[00:21:03] Speaker F: Hmm. Just gonna move there.
[00:21:07] Speaker B: Okay. He moves back. So now Brianna has to be attacked.
[00:21:12] Speaker E: Oh, my God.
[00:21:13] Speaker D: That's good.
[00:21:14] Speaker B: No, Saraya, it is your turn.
[00:21:17] Speaker E: Indeed it is.
[00:21:18] Speaker B: You just watched all of these creatures just get into the middle again.
[00:21:24] Speaker E: Right down again. She's. She's laughing. Definitely. This is hilarious. If I wanted to climb down without a climb suit. Is that an athletics check or.
[00:21:33] Speaker B: Yeah.
Well, hang on. We've. We've done this before.
[00:21:38] Speaker E: Well, it's. It would be only down to the first. I'm. I'm on the eastern side, so it's only, what, a ten foot drop, not a 20 foot drop?
[00:21:45] Speaker B: Yeah, you could. It's an athletics check. And you would move 5ft per action to move down.
[00:21:51] Speaker E: And if I just chose to drop down, it would be five damage and I'd be prone.
[00:21:54] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:21:55] Speaker E: What are the penalties from prone? And I tried to throw a bomb prone.
[00:21:59] Speaker B: You're lying flat on the ground. You are flat footed and take a minus two circumstance. Penalty to attack. Rolls.
[00:22:04] Speaker E: Minus two.
[00:22:04] Speaker B: Okay, you can take cover when you're prone and give yourself a fourth circumstance bonus to ac, but you are still flat footed.
[00:22:11] Speaker E: Okay, well, I'm gonna do what you see me doing here. I'm gonna run forward that 45ft and then roll off the side of the cliff.
So that's one action.
[00:22:21] Speaker B: You move 65ft.
[00:22:23] Speaker E: Sorry, that would be two actions. My apologies. That's why. That's why I wanted to know from the proneness. And I'm gonna throw another one of my smoke grenades into this clusterfuck.
[00:22:33] Speaker B: I will say you would have to kind of drop it straight down into the square where you see my mouse, because everything else is water and it wouldn't detonate.
[00:22:41] Speaker E: Okay, I'll do that. Because it's still a ten foot radius that gets a whole bunch of them.
[00:22:44] Speaker B: That's fine. I just wanted to.
[00:22:46] Speaker E: No problem.
31.
[00:22:49] Speaker B: 31. You hit the square.
[00:22:51] Speaker E: So it goes off. So it gets the boggard, the chirka, the worm, and the Na net. Yep. So everybody takes eight poison damage, and they have to make their fortitude safe. Or at least everybody above water.
[00:23:06] Speaker B: Eight damage kills one of the Churica. Oh, you've. You've aggressed the now net and then fortitude save.
[00:23:13] Speaker E: You said I have aggressed the now net, but I figured if the Trueca have aggressed it to start, it wasn't gonna stop just at them.
[00:23:21] Speaker B: Fair enough. And what is the DC 24? The nounet saves both the other ones.
[00:23:27] Speaker E: Fail, so the other two are sickened. Nao net is not sickened, but it has taken poison damage.
[00:23:32] Speaker B: All right. It is now the void worms turn. They are just chilling where they are. Except the one that Christine hit is now going to fly.
[00:23:42] Speaker C: Thought it was air swimming.
[00:23:43] Speaker E: Yes, air swim.
[00:23:46] Speaker B: Air swims back to the pillar. This boggard's still on land.
[00:23:50] Speaker E: I'm going to assume no one else is going to. This would be the start of the third round of the old bomb smoke, but I'm going to assume no one else is going to run through it.
[00:23:57] Speaker B: It goes away at the start, so then no one would make it there.
[00:24:00] Speaker C: So the one that just moved took damage at the beginning of the turn, right?
[00:24:02] Speaker B: Yes. How much damage did he take for.
[00:24:04] Speaker E: The second round of exposure? It's one v six. And he has to make another save. All right, three poison.
[00:24:12] Speaker B: That's a fail.
[00:24:12] Speaker E: It's another round of being sick and.
[00:24:14] Speaker B: Oh, boy. All right, void worm. Okay, so this boggart has to jump in the water to get around things. Luckily, he has a swim speed.
[00:24:25] Speaker C: But now we find out if the NaO nets have reactions.
[00:24:28] Speaker E: That's true.
[00:24:29] Speaker B: Oh, you're right. We do get to find out if they have reactions.
No, they do not.
[00:24:37] Speaker C: Now they do not.
[00:24:38] Speaker E: Yeah. When a PC runs by, it might be different.
[00:24:42] Speaker F: Yeah.
[00:24:43] Speaker B: Void worm does nothing. Top of the round, Brianna. This is the top of round four.
[00:24:50] Speaker D: Okay. Brianna only has two more javelins.
[00:24:54] Speaker B: Well, there is someone who's around in the corner.
[00:24:58] Speaker D: I thought we weren't breaking.
[00:25:00] Speaker C: Sean wants you to break formation.
[00:25:02] Speaker B: I'm merely giving you the information that I, you know, want to make sure you have. Uh huh. She's a pick.
[00:25:08] Speaker D: So since I am stunned again, she will grab and.
[00:25:12] Speaker B: All right. Who are you throwing at?
[00:25:14] Speaker C: Could I encourage you to heal my behind on my face?
[00:25:19] Speaker B: Probably just his ass.
[00:25:21] Speaker D: I mean, I prefer your butt that way. Grab it and say it's totally Brianna doing it and not me.
[00:25:29] Speaker C: I mean, we're married.
[00:25:30] Speaker B: Oh, right. Are we?
[00:25:32] Speaker E: I was there.
[00:25:33] Speaker D: You all were. Now that I think about it, yeah. I will happily heal your behind and nothing else. So DC is 15.
[00:25:43] Speaker C: I was gonna ask, what is your proficiency with it?
[00:25:46] Speaker D: Currently it's trained.
[00:25:47] Speaker C: Okay, nevermind.
[00:25:48] Speaker B: But that's a critical success because I'm.
[00:25:50] Speaker D: Also wearing the healing gloves.
[00:25:51] Speaker B: What did the healing gloves do? I forget.
[00:25:53] Speaker C: Plus one.
[00:25:54] Speaker B: Okay, great. Well, you get four d, eight hit points, and your wounded condition is removed if you have it.
[00:26:00] Speaker C: Battle medicine does not remove the wounded condition.
[00:26:02] Speaker D: 22 points back.
[00:26:04] Speaker C: Thank you.
[00:26:06] Speaker D: That's all I can do this turn. Can I flavor turn to the church and like, bang my hand or my gauntlet against my shield? Just kind of like egging them towards your shield.
[00:26:18] Speaker B: Yeah. That's only one action.
[00:26:20] Speaker D: Well, there you go. Let's do that then.
[00:26:21] Speaker C: I mean, you can still flavor bang your shield or bang a gong or whatever you want to bang.
[00:26:26] Speaker D: Well, maybe later.
[00:26:28] Speaker C: Yep.
[00:26:29] Speaker D: Oh, well, that's all I'm doing.
[00:26:35] Speaker B: I'm uncomfortable.
[00:26:38] Speaker E: Good question.
[00:26:40] Speaker B: One of the boggards. One of the boggards that's fallen so many times, what year do they have? So this boggard frustrated, much like the GM is going to run for three actions because that's all it can do.
I knew you guys were gonna be smart about this fight. Like, I knew that.
[00:27:05] Speaker E: I don't think any of us were anticipating gravity.
[00:27:07] Speaker D: Well, yeah, no, that was awesome.
[00:27:10] Speaker B: But I'm frustrated with how smart you guys have taken this.
[00:27:14] Speaker C: Thanks, Rob.
It's not enough that they run around in a circle. I have to do it twice or three times.
[00:27:19] Speaker F: Yeah, it's a shame I get four casts of third level.
[00:27:24] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:27:27] Speaker B: I have to zoom out so far to find some of my. My NPC's. There he is.
[00:27:33] Speaker E: They are kind of all over the map at this point. Just for reference, do we ever tell our listeners that this pit is probably like, like a hundred feet across easily? Like top to bottom?
[00:27:44] Speaker B: That sure can move. Quintallon, it is your turn.
[00:27:48] Speaker C: So I'm gonna do a thing that we don't normally do, which is to ready in action.
[00:27:53] Speaker B: Oh, boy.
[00:27:55] Speaker C: If a shurike comes with, or if any enemy really comes within melee range, I am going to quick draw my sword and strike it.
[00:28:05] Speaker B: Gotcha. Lager to the south. Seeing what his friend is doing, he will hop, hip hop, hip hop anonymous for two actions and reach into his the bag that he has and pull out an item. Void worms don't do anything. The churica that hits the closest is so angry, it is going to run directly at you.
[00:28:29] Speaker C: And as it approaches, he will whip his sword up. All right, that's a 35.
[00:28:36] Speaker B: That's a critical hit.
[00:28:40] Speaker C: Now we're in melee, which is where I live.
[00:28:43] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:28:47] Speaker C: I'm gonna roll my damage. My normal damage.
[00:28:50] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:28:50] Speaker C: So it's that which is eleven plus one. So twelve plus ten more. So 22 is the base damage.
[00:28:59] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:29:00] Speaker D: Oh, my gosh.
[00:29:01] Speaker B: And draw your hit card, please, sir.
[00:29:05] Speaker C: Slashing flay. Normal damage. Meh. The target is enfeebled. Three until healed.
[00:29:12] Speaker B: No, he's not. He dead, you people forevermore.
[00:29:16] Speaker C: And then I'm going to look at the churrocar that's coming up the path and I'm going to try to intimidate them.
[00:29:22] Speaker B: All right? And that's versus his will.
[00:29:26] Speaker C: DC.
[00:29:26] Speaker B: Will.
[00:29:27] Speaker C: DC.
[00:29:27] Speaker B: Can you do this?
[00:29:29] Speaker C: No.
[00:29:30] Speaker A: 19, you succeed.
[00:29:33] Speaker C: Ooh, thanks. The first time I was actually worked. Okay, so he's demoralized.
[00:29:37] Speaker B: One frightened, which means he is scurred.
[00:29:43] Speaker C: Takes a status penalty equal to this value to all of his checks and DC's.
[00:29:48] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:29:48] Speaker C: But at the end of his turn, it goes away.
[00:29:50] Speaker B: He's already gone this turn. But that being said, the dragon pillar is going to attack. Ooh, Saraya.
[00:29:57] Speaker C: Okay, now, before you do that, realize that they're actually both 40ft away because the dragon pillar is large.
[00:30:05] Speaker B: Oh, that's right. Okay, let me roll.
[00:30:07] Speaker C: So even Steven chances.
[00:30:10] Speaker B: Let me roll for the first time.
Brianna. Brianna, you're one. Saraya, you're two.
[00:30:18] Speaker D: No. Come on.
[00:30:23] Speaker E: Hit her.
[00:30:24] Speaker D: And I still can. Delivery.
[00:30:25] Speaker B: Can I? Yeah. No, she is way too far.
[00:30:27] Speaker E: I'm also literally across the pit.
[00:30:30] Speaker B: Go ahead and roll. A will save.
[00:30:33] Speaker C: So the dragon pillar is almost directly centered between these two.
[00:30:36] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:30:37] Speaker C: So they're like yeah, 70 some odd feet apart.
[00:30:39] Speaker B: She's also like 10ft down too.
[00:30:42] Speaker E: So by Pythagoras theory 15, I'm gonna use my hero because I'm sure that does not.
[00:30:51] Speaker B: Delicious. No, I take your hero point.
[00:30:56] Speaker E: I did 26.
[00:30:59] Speaker B: You are, you succeed and you are stunned. One.
[00:31:03] Speaker E: Yay.
[00:31:04] Speaker B: One day this will, someone will fail and they will be more stunned.
[00:31:11] Speaker C: Or feel free to shoot any of your other creatures shot.
[00:31:13] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:31:14] Speaker B: The Nao net will flash a tentacle out at the churica in the water. The tentacle will 25 hit and it will deal. It'll deal 21 points of damage and then it will snap its jaws out at it and miss. Oh, first miss of its turn and then the tail whips around and tries to smack it and that will also miss. Alright. The Nao net just took a single bite and then missed on its other two attacks.
[00:31:52] Speaker E: Which now not the one that's.
[00:31:54] Speaker B: Oh, the one that's in your smoke. One D six poison.
[00:31:57] Speaker E: And he makes another fort save.
[00:31:59] Speaker B: Fort save. Yes. Oh, 21.
[00:32:03] Speaker E: So he fails. He is second one. And he takes one poison.
[00:32:07] Speaker B: All right, take one poison sickened. There we go. Second one. It is now one of the Chiricah's turns.
[00:32:16] Speaker C: He bleeds.
[00:32:16] Speaker B: No, he bleeds. One D six bleed please.
[00:32:19] Speaker D: Aye, aye, aye.
[00:32:20] Speaker B: Six six damage. Yes. Turkat falls down dead.
[00:32:25] Speaker C: Good job.
[00:32:29] Speaker B: The other Naonet swims 5ft closer and attacks the churica. Still in the water with a tentacle. 24 will hit and deals 15 points of damage and then will snap at it.
And we'll cr.
Not crit it, just regular hit. It is.
[00:32:52] Speaker C: It does z snap, Shawn. Is that what I heard?
[00:32:54] Speaker B: Yes. You did hear a Z snap his.
[00:32:57] Speaker E: Talons in a z formation.
[00:32:58] Speaker B: Yep. For 21 points of damage. I'm scared to say this knife sword, it is your turn.
[00:33:10] Speaker D: Get em.
[00:33:10] Speaker F: Hmm. Okay. Well I was gonna go down there but that guy's dead. I could just have fun and do this again.
[00:33:15] Speaker E: Yes.
[00:33:16] Speaker C: It's your jam, Rob.
[00:33:18] Speaker E: Like you think you got away. Think again.
[00:33:20] Speaker F: Oh wait, that would.
[00:33:21] Speaker B: Rob, are you gonna pull?
[00:33:22] Speaker F: Yeah.
[00:33:22] Speaker B: Are you gonna pull the one chiricah that's still up on the bridge down into the water?
Seems like a waste of a spell.
[00:33:31] Speaker C: I'm curious what your other third level spells are. But that would be meta gaming.
Well that is very precisely placed, Robert.
[00:33:38] Speaker F: Yeah.
[00:33:39] Speaker E: Wow. Yeah.
[00:33:40] Speaker B: What? What did you cast? Gravity well. So are we gravity welling?
[00:33:44] Speaker F: Yep.
[00:33:45] Speaker B: Right. Let me just select everything here and I'm going to make some rolls I'm.
[00:33:51] Speaker C: Very confused and also curious by this. This character because he's used gravity well, which is arcane, occult. He's used magic missile, which is arcane or occult. And he's used stabilize, which is divine or primal.
[00:34:06] Speaker B: Well, here's what I would like to say.
Everyone failed except for the newer now net. And of those failed, most of them are critical fails.
[00:34:22] Speaker C: Who does dragon pillar fail?
[00:34:24] Speaker B: Well, I'm going down the line right now. So void worm one failed and will be moving 30ft into the churica, who will make a reflex a 13, which fails. But the void worm didn't fall, so no damage.
[00:34:40] Speaker C: Yeah, I don't think they have to. I wouldn't waste the time with the reflex saves unless they're falling.
[00:34:43] Speaker B: Void worm two moves 30ft. Void worm three moves 30ft. Void worm four moves 15ft. Dragon pillar.
[00:34:54] Speaker C: Please let it fly up in the air and crush those people in the center of the right.
[00:34:58] Speaker B: It just gets twice.
30ft. But I need to look up one thing.
[00:35:04] Speaker E: I just love it. It just gets uprooted and flung into the lake.
[00:35:08] Speaker C: Yeah, that would be awesome. And just, like, crushes the chiricah and some of these, like, worm things.
[00:35:14] Speaker E: I love the worm things, though. I'm glad there's one. Exactly. One, like, outside the effect radius.
[00:35:19] Speaker B: If you look by the square.
[00:35:20] Speaker E: Sorry, there's two. I'm like, yes. I want them as pets.
[00:35:23] Speaker F: More fish food. More fish food.
[00:35:26] Speaker E: I just imagine, like, I'm just imagining, like, sorcerer's apprentice levels of escalation here, and he's just cackling and conducting music in his head, dragging everything into the lake.
[00:35:39] Speaker F: It all go down the hole.
[00:35:45] Speaker B: The pillar does get ripped out of the ground because it fails work and it flies 15ft.
[00:35:55] Speaker C: That's where the church.
[00:35:56] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna say it does a d six damage to everything it hit. It's solid. Two d six damage to everything it hits in the 15 foot line. Does that work for you guys?
[00:36:07] Speaker C: That's. That's sure fine by me.
[00:36:10] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
[00:36:10] Speaker F: Was that good?
[00:36:11] Speaker B: Yeah, very good.
[00:36:13] Speaker D: Very good.
[00:36:15] Speaker E: Surrey from where she is, like, lying prone, just like, thumbs up.
[00:36:19] Speaker B: Yeah. So it's gonna hit two void worms in the churica and be disabled. So two d six on the void worm, the other void worm eight. And let's be honest on the one that you really care about, the Chiricah six kills. That void worm hurts. That void worm hurts that. Rob.
[00:36:38] Speaker D: Hmm?
[00:36:38] Speaker B: I'm trying to get my new year's resolution is to get better about handing out hero points.
So since you disabled the pillar with a incredible random spell that you picked that I'm loving, but I'm not really loving.
You got your third hero point. You have all three. You can't gain any more until you use them.
[00:37:03] Speaker D: Yeah, until you use them, of course.
[00:37:05] Speaker B: And then that slides.
[00:37:07] Speaker F: Can I buy a snack?
[00:37:10] Speaker C: Should you say a snack?
[00:37:11] Speaker F: Yeah.
[00:37:14] Speaker B: I'll allow it with hero points.
[00:37:16] Speaker F: Like some. Like some burned mutton or. I don't know.
[00:37:20] Speaker B: It has to be burned.
[00:37:23] Speaker F: Week old gutter water. I mean, just something nice.
[00:37:26] Speaker C: Yeah. Treat yourself.
[00:37:28] Speaker B: You have one more action.
[00:37:30] Speaker C: Rob, the greatest thing about that spell is its range is, like, 120ft.
[00:37:34] Speaker B: Yeah, no, no, it's a terrible spell. Stop using it.
[00:37:39] Speaker E: Look, the only thing different about this and fireball is that fireball doesn't move.
[00:37:43] Speaker C: Anybody, so he moves behind us a little farther.
[00:37:47] Speaker F: Okay.
[00:37:49] Speaker B: All right, Saraya, let's see.
[00:37:51] Speaker E: I'm gonna stand up for an action. Actually, wait, no, I only have two actions this turn.
[00:37:55] Speaker B: Yeah, that's right.
[00:37:56] Speaker E: If I'm aiming at the Nau net, will bombs detonate or no? Because it's in the water, I assume part of it is out of the water.
[00:38:02] Speaker B: It is partly out of the water. So if you hit it, it will.
[00:38:06] Speaker E: Go off, then, yes, I will stand up and I will chuck an alchemist's fire at it will be my two actions for the turn.
[00:38:12] Speaker B: That's fair.
[00:38:13] Speaker E: 23 to hit.
[00:38:14] Speaker B: That will. 23 will hit.
[00:38:17] Speaker E: Yes. I also have directional splash so I can. I can catch the void worm and the churica with the splash damage. All right, so it's taking.
The nana is taking ten fire damage.
[00:38:33] Speaker B: Right?
[00:38:34] Speaker E: And all of them, because it's large, are taking two. Fire, splash. And the nanomet has two persistent fire on it.
[00:38:43] Speaker B: Oh, boy. Next up on the list is a void worm. Oh, it doesn't have a thing to go to now. Oh, no.
[00:38:53] Speaker C: Well, it's still there. It's just laying on the ground.
[00:38:56] Speaker B: Yeah, well, it's actually in the water, so it's gonna swim over to where it is.
[00:39:00] Speaker C: Air swim.
[00:39:01] Speaker B: Air swim.
[00:39:01] Speaker E: Air swim. And then swim, swim.
[00:39:03] Speaker B: Yes. This boggard is going to hop.
[00:39:06] Speaker D: I was kind of hoping that the void worm would be like, aw, shiny elf follows the rare round.
[00:39:14] Speaker E: I would be totally fine with that if it just decided I was its new object of fixation. I would love that. That would be amazing.
I'm just saying.
[00:39:22] Speaker C: So you wake up in the middle of the night and it's standing naked at the bottom of your bed eating spongeBob.
[00:39:27] Speaker B: Brianna, it is your turn.
[00:39:29] Speaker D: Brianna doesn't like, the fact that Surya's over there, but at the same time, there are things coming this way and she was told to hold formation. If only she could, like, attach a treat wounds to the end of her javelin and then chuck at a tsuraya or something.
[00:39:46] Speaker E: Alas, I've literally taken five damage. It's fine.
Oh, I should note that, but, yeah, I've literally only taken five damage.
[00:39:56] Speaker D: Remind me what's going on with the kermits.
[00:39:57] Speaker B: They're running at the wall, and one of them has pulled out an item.
[00:40:01] Speaker D: Which one? The northmost one.
[00:40:03] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:40:03] Speaker D: Cool. She will aim her ultimate javelin, her last javelin at him, and hopefully hit. 22.
[00:40:10] Speaker B: 22 will hit.
[00:40:15] Speaker D: Cool. Take nine damage.
[00:40:18] Speaker B: Nine.
[00:40:19] Speaker D: Nine.
[00:40:19] Speaker B: Sure. Yes. It's dead.
[00:40:22] Speaker D: Yes. I think that's all I can do.
[00:40:25] Speaker C: Well, you have a third action. Right, because you weren't stunned at the beginning of this turn. For once.
[00:40:29] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:40:30] Speaker D: Um, I'll raise a shield. Look at that.
[00:40:32] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:40:33] Speaker B: There you go.
[00:40:36] Speaker C: What's racing out? 30.
[00:40:38] Speaker D: No, 29 with the. With the shield up.
[00:40:40] Speaker C: Oh, my bad.
[00:40:41] Speaker B: Okay, so the boggard that is on the wall watches his friend get stabbed down with a javelin. Croaks. Not. He doesn't die. He just rivets, reaches down and grabs the item out of his friend's dead hands. For one, throws a grip grappling hook with a rope attached to it. For two, it lands right here.
[00:41:05] Speaker C: Did he remember to hold onto the other end of the rope?
[00:41:07] Speaker B: Yes.
And third action is he is going to start to climb. He makes a climb check, which is athletics. He succeeds. So he moves 10ft up.
He moves 5ft up. Background sound effects provided by siren.
[00:41:25] Speaker C: See you in a couple rounds, buddy.
[00:41:27] Speaker B: The Chiricah is in the water, finally gets out of the water and then runs to where the rope is. And that is his turn. Two actions. The Chiricah that has finally made it up the hill runs at twin Talon and strikes at him with a fist.
[00:41:45] Speaker C: The demoralized one.
[00:41:46] Speaker B: Yes. Or twelve.
[00:41:48] Speaker C: That's a critical failure.
[00:41:50] Speaker B: Crit. Miscar. Now, I would like to tell you guys something. Our patrons, our lovely patrons tend to submit more critical miscarriage than critical hit cards. What?
[00:42:01] Speaker D: What are you trying to do, guys?
[00:42:04] Speaker E: Uh, has Anwar tried to do that yet?
[00:42:06] Speaker B: Not yet.
[00:42:08] Speaker E: Anwar, please give us a critical hit.
[00:42:10] Speaker B: Uh, so this is called. This one's called stinging failure until healed. You take a minus two circumstance penalty to attack rolls made with this attack. Okay, so his.
[00:42:22] Speaker C: He's minus two, but he's not terrified anymore.
[00:42:25] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:42:25] Speaker D: Was that one submitted by our patrons?
[00:42:28] Speaker B: No. I have their names written on the bottom if it was so we know who to thank.
[00:42:33] Speaker C: Slash blame.
[00:42:35] Speaker B: Yeah, exactly. And the other nice thing I will say is because, you know, we want to make sure our our patrons get their stuff out as frequently as possible. I have weighted it so that their cards might come up sooner than not. But once you draw the card, it does not get replaced till we go through all of them.
[00:42:57] Speaker D: Okay?
[00:42:58] Speaker B: So they have a higher chance of showing up sooner. Now, with that being said, twin Talon, it is your turn.
[00:43:05] Speaker C: All right, twin towns.
[00:43:06] Speaker B: There's a monkey in your face.
[00:43:08] Speaker C: It's better than on my back. Twin town's gonna say no. This is how you do it. And he's going to.
[00:43:13] Speaker B: And we will see how you do that next week. He's right there.
[00:43:17] Speaker E: See how it feels?
[00:43:18] Speaker B: See how it feels.
