[00:00:38] Speaker A: Hello everyone and welcome back for another episode of the Crack Die podcast. My name is Matt. I play twin talent on the show. Just want to give a quick shout out to all of our patrons, those of you who make this episode possible. Thank you Michael, Bippy, tea, Margaret, Chris, Jason, Thomas, Duke, Celine, Shaka, David, Jeremy, Anwar, Doombeard, Cassandra, Mike, and Jacob. Thank you all so much. Without your support we could not do this show. So we appreciate you. Additionally, in case you are unaware, we've got a bunch of new Patreon tiers, so we still have the two and $5 tiers. The $2 tier getting you a thank you shout out as well as the $5 tier allowing you to create a Pathfinder critical hit or critical fumble card used on both of our shows. But now we also have a $10 tier which allows you to get exclusive cdp that's crack Die podcast swag. Whenever you hit multiples of $100 pledged, we have a $15 tiere where every month we will send you a discount code for merchandise in the merch store to get that sweet, sweet crack dye merch. Holidays are coming. Maybe there's someone that you like and you want to give them a crack dye mug or a t shirt or put my face on something. Discount codes. We got a dollar 20 tier for those who pledge at dollar 20 or above, every month we are going to do a hangout where we will either watch a movie or do a community game like jackbox or something similar with those of you who have pledged at the $20 tier. And finally, we have a $30 tier. And I am pleased, tickled pink in fact, to say that we do have a $30 patron. That's right, you know who you are. And every month we will play a Pathfinder society or star finder society scenario with those people who pledge $30 or more. And of course, when you pledge at a certain level, you get everything that comes below that level. So you who have been here for 104 episodes go to patreon.com crackdypodcast. Create an account if you need to and support the Crack Die podcast. Also this weekend, Saturday, November 13 at 01:00 p.m. eastern time to 04:00 p.m. eastern time we'll be doing our Twitch show at Twitch TV. Crackeddye. All right, I think I have done all the plugs. So let's get to the show. Can you guess who dies first? This episode? Episode 104 of the Crack Dye podcast Sea and sand welcome to the hundred.
[00:03:28] Speaker B: And fourth episode of the Cracked Die podcast.
[00:03:32] Speaker C: All right, let's do it.
[00:03:34] Speaker A: We're almost done this combat, guys, there's only one guy left.
[00:03:38] Speaker B: All right, so normally we have some witty banter, something about something. I don't know, let's just jump to the table.
[00:03:48] Speaker A: Well, speaking of which.
[00:03:49] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:03:50] Speaker A: Knockdown. So knockdown. If we remember last week, there was a question about what this dude's knockdown ability did. Cause you said that he had a club and in the entry in the book it said knockdown, right?
[00:04:02] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:04:03] Speaker A: So I did a little digging and I don't know if it's the same. Okay, but sometimes monsters have knockdown. And if a monster has knockdown, basically they have an ability that says if their previous attack was a hit or the previous action was to attack and it succeeded, they can spend an action to knock somebody prone automatically. Okay, so maybe that's what it is.
[00:04:25] Speaker B: That's probably what it is.
[00:04:27] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:04:27] Speaker B: Because this is. Is a monstrous person.
[00:04:30] Speaker A: Yeah, but anyway, that's all I got for that.
[00:04:32] Speaker B: Yeah, so last time you guys had dealt with the Drakes, dealt with all of the rest of the scarlet triad members, except for this one eyed guy who hit twin Talon in the face with a club and then while he was reeling, kicked him in the stomach and then ran away, who decided to chase after him. And then everyone else caught up with him and now it is back to his turn and he is lying on the ground.
So he's going to try and stand up.
[00:05:06] Speaker A: Stand up.
[00:05:07] Speaker B: Does anyone have a reaction?
[00:05:09] Speaker D: No.
[00:05:09] Speaker E: Nah, I don't care.
[00:05:11] Speaker B: Okay, he's going to grab his club and he's going to look at the person blocking his path out and that's knife sword. And he is going to try and hit him with a great club.
[00:05:28] Speaker F: Doesn't he first have to like, you know, roll against retching? If my smell.
[00:05:32] Speaker B: Unfortunately, no.
Does a 33 hit?
[00:05:36] Speaker F: You might be lying if I said no.
[00:05:38] Speaker B: Okay, so the great club connects and does 16 points of damage.
[00:05:44] Speaker A: Wow. He had hit a plus 22 before he was feeble.
[00:05:48] Speaker F: Yeah, that's it.
[00:05:50] Speaker B: My turn is over. And I fear that is the last turn he is going to ever get. It's probably very likely twin talon.
[00:05:57] Speaker A: Okay, so twin Talon is gonna go. He is going to attack a the one eyed bad guy. Okay, that is a 38 versus flat footed ac.
[00:06:09] Speaker B: Oh my goodness. Yeah, that is definitely a crit. I want to see.
38 is a single crit.
[00:06:15] Speaker A: Okay. Overreaction, normal damage. The target triggers reaction as if it had just used a move action. It is also flat footed until the end of its next turn. I guess it's just flat footed for everybody.
Do damage to it.
25 damage.
[00:06:30] Speaker B: You also marked him at the end of the last turn to do.
[00:06:33] Speaker A: I did.
[00:06:35] Speaker B: You did. I don't want you to. What you did. So.
[00:06:38] Speaker A: Additional five. So 30 total.
[00:06:40] Speaker B: Would you like to describe how you dispatch this gentleman?
[00:06:44] Speaker A: The guy stands up and takes a swat at knife, sword, and Twintalon hooks his left arm around the guy's neck and pulls him backwards and impales him on his short sword so that it is poking out his chest. And then he kicks him free.
[00:06:59] Speaker B: All right. And with that, our six round combat is over.
[00:07:04] Speaker A: One round per episode. Whoop, whoop.
[00:07:08] Speaker B: Ooh. You are now exhausted as your rage is no more.
[00:07:13] Speaker C: Oh, boy. I guess me too then.
[00:07:15] Speaker B: Yup.
[00:07:16] Speaker E: Hey, y'all, can we take a cigarette break? Mama needs a little nap.
[00:07:20] Speaker C: I think I might need it too. What did you hit me with? What did you slap my ass with?
[00:07:26] Speaker E: Sex appeal.
[00:07:27] Speaker C: Good point. I've never had it before. No, thank you.
[00:07:31] Speaker D: Do we want to perhaps let these two rest and see if we can find the rest of the townsfolk? Or do we think that they're not in much danger? If we've dispatched of everyone, I think.
[00:07:42] Speaker A: We can at least look for him. Twintalon will start padding down the sky to see if he's got keys or anything that would maybe help in rescuing the people.
[00:07:51] Speaker B: All right, so you're gonna take some time to dig around and I'm assuming you're gonna loot all of them, taking all stuff. Okay, cool. So, Saraya, what are you doing?
[00:08:03] Speaker D: Where is the smokehouse from here?
[00:08:06] Speaker B: You are standing right in front of it.
[00:08:09] Speaker D: It is this octagonal building.
[00:08:10] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:08:11] Speaker D: Are there any windows?
[00:08:13] Speaker B: There is a single door that is completely boarded up at ground level on the side that you are standing in.
[00:08:19] Speaker A: So the east side?
[00:08:20] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:08:21] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:08:22] Speaker B: There are steps that lead up to the roof. And this is a cupola, just so you know, there are vents at the very top just wide enough for you to shimmy through if you wanted to. However, they are about 20ft above the ground. There's no easy way to reach to them.
[00:08:43] Speaker D: But there's. There's no windows anywhere around this building.
[00:08:45] Speaker A: Sorry, I got caught up in the word coppola. Can you go back? What is that?
[00:08:50] Speaker B: Coppola?
[00:08:51] Speaker A: Yeah, I looked it up and it's a hat. So I'm trying to figure out.
[00:08:54] Speaker C: It's a cupola.
[00:08:55] Speaker B: Cupola. C U P O L A.
In architecture, a cupola sometimes is a relatively small, most often dome like tall structure. On top of a building often used to provide a lookout to emit light and air. It usually crowns a larger roof or dome.
[00:09:17] Speaker A: Okay, so it almost looks like a belt.
[00:09:18] Speaker D: So twin Talon would know this.
[00:09:20] Speaker A: Yeah, architecture, baby.
[00:09:23] Speaker D: Exactly.
I'm going to send Jasper down in the vent and then tell him to come back and report what he sees.
[00:09:32] Speaker B: Okay. Ooh, you're laying down. You said to kind of rest up.
[00:09:36] Speaker E: Yes, I'm gonna lay down.
[00:09:37] Speaker B: Okay, cool. And then Brianna is also going to take a minute to catch her breath and lay down.
[00:09:44] Speaker E: You can lay down next to me. It's all right.
[00:09:46] Speaker C: Uh, sure.
[00:09:52] Speaker D: Saray was gonna go over and talk to Ub and now she's like, well, I guess I'd be intruding. No, no, no.
[00:09:57] Speaker C: Please, please, please join. Please help.
[00:10:03] Speaker B: Knife. Sword. What are you doing?
[00:10:05] Speaker F: Well, I was gonna go back to my apartment and take a nap, but somebody's laying on it, so. So.
Guess I can't.
[00:10:13] Speaker C: You know what, as the kids still do say these days, cope.
[00:10:20] Speaker F: I'm just gonna lay near everybody else and let them experience my aroma orange poop.
[00:10:28] Speaker B: Great. All right, so, twin Talon, you find the following items, okay? A chainmail shirt in the bag. A plus one flail in the bag. Average manacles with some keys in the bag. And three javelins in the bag.
You also find.
[00:10:53] Speaker A: That sounds like the stuff that was on the dwarf.
[00:10:55] Speaker B: That was the dwarf, yes. You find three bloodseeker beaks in the bag. Nine daggers.
[00:11:05] Speaker A: Ooh, in the bag.
[00:11:06] Speaker B: Leather armor times three.
[00:11:08] Speaker A: Bag, bag, bag.
[00:11:10] Speaker B: Three more sets of average manacles marked with the symbol of the scarlet triad.
[00:11:15] Speaker A: Ooh, in the bag.
[00:11:16] Speaker B: Three plus one rapiers.
[00:11:18] Speaker A: Put them in the bag.
[00:11:21] Speaker B: Three sets of thieves. Tools.
[00:11:23] Speaker A: Bag.
[00:11:24] Speaker B: Okay. And then lastly, you find on the eye patch guy a chain shirt in the bag, a plus one striking. Great club.
[00:11:39] Speaker A: Anybody? Anybody want to use a great club?
[00:11:43] Speaker D: I need my hands.
[00:11:44] Speaker C: And I'm happy with my scimitar. It is surrender's weapon.
[00:11:48] Speaker B: What does it do?
[00:11:48] Speaker A: Oh, it's a big stick. It's kind of falcon shape. And you can beat people with it.
[00:11:54] Speaker B: There are spikes on it.
[00:11:56] Speaker E: I do like that.
[00:11:59] Speaker D: Sure, I'll hang on to it.
[00:12:00] Speaker B: It does have a plus one rune on it. And it has a striking rune on it. All right, keys to manacles in the bag. Average manacles in the bag. Three sets of them, actually. And they're all marked with the symbol of the scarlet triad.
[00:12:17] Speaker A: Bag to bag. Bag, bag.
[00:12:19] Speaker B: A plus one short bow bag. Okay. And ten arrows in the bag.
[00:12:25] Speaker A: Yeah, my quiver's full. I barely use arrows anymore. I feel like I use them early on and now it's just like, eh, just get close, stab a guy. That's better. Okay.
[00:12:33] Speaker F: Is a short bow a simple weapon?
[00:12:35] Speaker A: It is a martial weapon.
[00:12:37] Speaker F: Oh never mind.
[00:12:38] Speaker A: Short bows and longbows are both martial weapons.
[00:12:40] Speaker F: I just thought if it was like a simple weapon I could use it to, you know, supplement my range when I run out of spells.
[00:12:46] Speaker A: Yeah, no, that would be like crossbows typically are that I. Oh, okay. They take time to load, but they are simple weapons so anyone can use them.
[00:12:54] Speaker D: Um, while she's waiting for Jasper to come back, Saraya's gonna like scoot over to where ooh and Brianna are just like sit down, wave.
[00:13:05] Speaker C: Hey girl.
[00:13:05] Speaker E: Y'all come snuggle up right next to me. Just grab them both and just bring them into my big boobies.
[00:13:12] Speaker F: Hey wait up.
[00:13:18] Speaker E: This is the laugh ride here.
[00:13:20] Speaker C: Why are you fighting a twin talon?
[00:13:23] Speaker A: I'm just doing all the work, that's all. No problem, don't worry about it. You guys just lay down.
I'm gonna put my bones back together and collect all this stuff and then I'll be right with you.
[00:13:31] Speaker C: Give me a second, I'll do your bones.
[00:13:34] Speaker D: Would you like an elixir?
[00:13:35] Speaker A: Yeah, that'd be great.
[00:13:37] Speaker D: Just check em on.
[00:13:38] Speaker B: Elixir of life.
[00:13:38] Speaker C: You said yes.
[00:13:40] Speaker D: Moderate.
[00:13:41] Speaker B: Moderate is five d, six plus twelve and a plus two item bonus to saving throws against disease and poisons for ten minutes.
[00:13:49] Speaker A: Do you wanna roll it?
[00:13:50] Speaker D: You can.
[00:13:50] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:13:51] Speaker D: You're the one drinking it.
[00:13:52] Speaker B: Christine, I have brought you over to a different map.
[00:13:54] Speaker D: I see.
[00:13:56] Speaker B: This is what Jasper sees.
[00:13:58] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:13:58] Speaker B: There is an active fire pit in the middle.
Let me give you a better description than what I'm about to do. The air in the smokehouse is dry and filled with the odor of fish. Racks of preserved meat, mostly fish, but some pork as well. Cover the walls and surround a large fire pit in the room's center. You notice that there are 16 prisoners chained to the racks where the meat is. However, they seem to be in much better health than the ones on the boat.
[00:14:28] Speaker D: And there's no one else in here, it's just the prisoners in the fire.
[00:14:30] Speaker B: Correct. Jasper flies out while he's observing all.
[00:14:33] Speaker D: Of that and she's getting crushed into ooze boobs. She'll just kind of say like, oh well, you know, it's. I have to say your fighting was also quite impressive, like you mentioned to me earlier. And before she can say anything more awkward, Jasper comes back over and relates that information. So, yeah, no captors, just prisoners. We should be able to open the door and let them out with no problem.
[00:14:56] Speaker A: This is the door that's boarded up that we can open.
[00:14:58] Speaker B: The door is very much barricaded, but.
[00:15:00] Speaker A: My point is, that's the only door in and out for, like, human sized people. Okay.
[00:15:05] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:15:05] Speaker A: So.
[00:15:06] Speaker B: Well, there are the slits where you see smoke coming out that are large enough for a medium sized creature to go through.
[00:15:12] Speaker D: Oh, and those were up top?
[00:15:14] Speaker B: Yes. They're about 20ft in the air.
[00:15:15] Speaker D: Yeah. So, like, those are like, air vents at the top. They're not like.
[00:15:17] Speaker A: Yeah, we gotta get these people out and who knows what state they're in.
[00:15:20] Speaker D: So they seemed not too bad. Better than the ship.
[00:15:24] Speaker A: Well, twin town's gonna start working on getting boards off the door.
[00:15:27] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:15:28] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:15:28] Speaker D: I'm still trying to help. I don't know how much help she'll actually be, but.
[00:15:32] Speaker B: Okay. So it takes a bit of time. The boards on this door are obviously set up so that no one can get in or out. It seems that once those prisoners were in there, they didn't want anyone to get out, maybe ever.
[00:15:47] Speaker D: Well, their plan was to light it on fire, wasn't it?
[00:15:49] Speaker A: They're gonna smoke, these people.
[00:15:50] Speaker B: Yeah. So after about a half hour of work, you manage to pull. Pull through the last board and you are able to go into the very cramped, tight area of the nine shields smokehouse Quintana.
[00:16:09] Speaker D: Did you find any keys? It seems like they're all chained up.
[00:16:14] Speaker A: Yeah, I got a fistful of keys here.
[00:16:16] Speaker D: Beautiful.
[00:16:17] Speaker B: So as you go in, you see that these members look very healthy. They look as if no one has been hurt or anything like that.
[00:16:27] Speaker A: Great.
[00:16:28] Speaker D: And we start letting them go.
[00:16:30] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:16:30] Speaker B: As you unlock them, a elderly woman approaches you and smiles and says, thank you so much. My name is Geralila.
[00:16:41] Speaker A: Gerlila.
[00:16:42] Speaker B: Gerlila. It is x e r e l I l a h. Jerlila. Jerlila. Jerlilah.
[00:16:53] Speaker C: Hey there, Jerlilah.
[00:16:54] Speaker A: What's it like inside the smokehouse? Did you think you're gonna die?
So we came and let your ass up.
[00:17:02] Speaker C: Yes, we did.
[00:17:06] Speaker B: Hero point.
[00:17:07] Speaker C: Yay.
[00:17:09] Speaker B: I appreciated that way too much.
So they approach you and they thank you for letting them out of. They let you know that they are the village leader and kind of ask you for news of what's going on.
[00:17:25] Speaker A: Well, your captors have been been dealt with. They did not manage to burn the town down, although their plan was to use 40 matches to do it. So I don't really know how smart they were. And the ship has been liberated, so the townsfolk that were on the ship have been. Have been let go. So I think you're in good shape.
[00:17:44] Speaker B: Oh, that's. That's wonderful. Um, I don't know what we can do to thank you enough for saving our town and making sure everyone is safe. Um, please, uh, you must all be exhausted. Uh, if you need to take some time to rest, please feel free to use our inn at no charge. It is all on the town. Just. Just to say thank you for everything you've done.
[00:18:12] Speaker A: Well, thank you.
[00:18:13] Speaker D: Do you know why. Why they might have come here?
[00:18:17] Speaker B: I really don't know. We're just a quiet fishing town, as you've probably noticed or seen.
I did hear someone on the roof earlier talking about a business called Sunset imports in Contago.
I don't know much more than that, but I'm assuming you can find out more information there.
[00:18:40] Speaker A: Yeah, that's the third time we've heard.
[00:18:44] Speaker C: That name, at least. Yes.
[00:18:46] Speaker A: And he mentioned someone's name, and it was the same name as someone else who we fought previously reported to. So we're.
I'm assuming that person is maybe both of their boss.
[00:18:59] Speaker B: Las Lynn, I believe the name was, right?
[00:19:01] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:19:02] Speaker E: Well, then which way is to.
[00:19:05] Speaker B: I mean, you're basically in the town center right now.
[00:19:07] Speaker E: Oh, delightful. I would like a small bag of money. I would like 50 very handsome dancing men, and I would like them in my bedroom, please.
[00:19:17] Speaker B: You see, one of the other just released captives come over and whisper into Zhe Lila's ear. And you see the old woman smile and nod, and she says, a party? That's. That's what we. We insist that you rest up, stay the night, and. And we insist that we have a party tomorrow in your honor.
[00:19:39] Speaker C: This is probably very paranoid of me, but can I roll a sense something fucking fishy's going on with that smile?
[00:19:46] Speaker B: Absolutely.
[00:19:47] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:19:47] Speaker B: Absolutely. Absolutely. Give me a perception. Yeah, sense motive 14. You're a little cautious, but I don't know, like, she doesn't have any markings of the scarlet triad or. That doesn't look like she's been involved in anything.
You might be cautious. A little weary, if you will.
[00:20:07] Speaker C: All right, all right. She will kind of stiffen and remove herself from ooh's arms and be like, thank you for your hospitality.
[00:20:16] Speaker B: It's my pleasure.
[00:20:17] Speaker F: Would nifester notice that Brianna seems a little suspicious?
[00:20:21] Speaker B: I don't know. Would he. Would she be showing that much suspicion?
[00:20:26] Speaker A: I mean, you can make a perception check to see if you notice anything.
[00:20:29] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:20:29] Speaker F: All right, 29.
[00:20:32] Speaker C: I guess with that, you would sense that she's definitely a bit more reserved. I don't know. You've been traveling with her enough, I.
[00:20:41] Speaker F: Think, in real life, we're almost at a year now, but I don't know in game time if it's, like, really.
[00:20:47] Speaker B: It'S been a month or so. Because after the miling expanse, you spent some time back.
[00:20:52] Speaker F: Okay.
[00:20:52] Speaker B: In Reach Hill. So, yeah, you've been with her for a bit.
[00:20:55] Speaker F: All right, I'm gonna scurry on over to her direction and whisper to her. Maybe we should cross reference this lady with Rollis Neanderland Nederland.
[00:21:05] Speaker C: Mm hmm.
Sure.
[00:21:08] Speaker F: Nether regions. I don't know. Yeah, I tried to write it down, but I can't read my writing.
Have you ever tried to read goblin scratch? It's hard.
[00:21:16] Speaker A: That's the old guy from the boat.
[00:21:18] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:21:20] Speaker C: I feel I would be more inclined to speak to them.
I don't know. Anyway, she's right there. Shush.
[00:21:29] Speaker F: Shh.
[00:21:32] Speaker B: Once you've unlocked everyone, they say their thanks, and they start heading out. Each one of them, like, shakes your hands and says thank you as they're leaving, except for knife sword. They look at knife sword and kind of give you a thumbs up.
[00:21:49] Speaker D: Nobody wants to touch knife sword.
[00:21:51] Speaker A: He's covered in poop.
[00:21:52] Speaker D: Yep.
[00:21:53] Speaker A: I think that's why they're giving us free rooms at the end. They're like, you could stay overnight and take a bath.
[00:21:58] Speaker F: But we never found the giant seagulls. They could still be in the area.
[00:22:02] Speaker A: I don't think they were giant seagulls, buddy.
[00:22:04] Speaker E: Shh, baby, don't worry. I'll save you.
[00:22:06] Speaker A: I think those. Those drakes were pretending to be giant seagulls just to get to you.
[00:22:10] Speaker F: Clever.
[00:22:11] Speaker A: But, yeah, we should go.
Twin Talon is going to head across town to that. The dude's shack or the shed that he said that we should go check out.
[00:22:21] Speaker B: Okay. The innkeeper is one of the people you just released. He said, oh, please, give me about an hour or so so I can make sure the rooms are all set up for you.
[00:22:30] Speaker D: Yes, not at all. Not a problem.
[00:22:31] Speaker E: Don't forget my 50 dancing man.
[00:22:33] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, that's the important part.
[00:22:35] Speaker E: Yes, yes, very important.
[00:22:36] Speaker B: So you head over to Rollis Nederland's shed. You head over to his shed, and you open it up. And as you look around, you see that there are a couple of things wrapped in well oiled leather. And as you carefully unwrap them, you find an adamantian battleaxe, a plus one resilient breastplate.
[00:23:04] Speaker C: Hmm.
Forget what I'm wearing.
[00:23:07] Speaker A: Plus one resilient full plate.
[00:23:09] Speaker C: Oh, then never mind. I'm good.
[00:23:10] Speaker B: Ooh.
[00:23:11] Speaker E: However, I'll take it. It's mine now.
[00:23:14] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:23:17] Speaker E: Just make sure I have lots of mobility in my nether regions.
[00:23:20] Speaker A: Well, this is a. This is a breastplate.
[00:23:22] Speaker E: It covers your chesticles area and my upper regions some. I need some movement.
[00:23:29] Speaker D: Well, when you're running in things, I would. I would imagine you want to kind of keep them still, so, I mean, you don't have to wear it all the time, but.
[00:23:34] Speaker E: Well, you know.
[00:23:36] Speaker B: So after you get these items, who want. Does anyone want the adamantine?
[00:23:42] Speaker A: Battleaxe.
[00:23:43] Speaker B: Battleaxe.
[00:23:44] Speaker D: I will.
[00:23:45] Speaker F: I'll take it.
[00:23:46] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:23:47] Speaker F: No, just kidding.
[00:23:48] Speaker E: I'll take it.
[00:23:48] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:23:49] Speaker C: That sounds something that's a more your speed.
[00:23:52] Speaker A: Yeah, it doesn't. It's nothing that fintalla would use.
[00:23:55] Speaker D: I don't think I know how to use it.
[00:23:57] Speaker A: Even though she had a sword, like, two swords, and she's just been punching the shit out of everybody, so we'll see.
[00:24:03] Speaker D: Sometimes that is the most satisfying way.
[00:24:05] Speaker E: Okay, I'm just gonna settle it all later. It's fine.
[00:24:08] Speaker A: No.
This poor guy.
[00:24:11] Speaker B: You head back to the inn, and as you approach, you notice that there's a sign on the inn that says close for special event. And when you walk in, there are six rooms. They have each been lavishly set up. They've basically. They've taken the twelve rooms they had and, like, opened the door between two rooms to make them, like, larger suites. For each of you, there is a tray of food set up in each of the rooms to say thank you, as well as baths drawn. And the water is bubbling hot, but comfortable hot, with some sort of magic being used to keep it warm. And the innkeeper says, this is the best I could do with such short notice. But you are all definitely the heroes of Cypress point. So we must. We wanted to make this as luxurious as possible.
[00:25:10] Speaker A: We definitely appreciate it.
[00:25:11] Speaker D: Well, thank you. This is. This is lovely.
[00:25:14] Speaker C: Truly.
[00:25:14] Speaker D: Are you sure we can offer you any kind of coin as recompense?
[00:25:18] Speaker B: No, no, no. You've saved the town, and I am no longer slowly cooking in a house made to dry meat out. So it's the least that we could do. We insist. Please, ma'am. And the innkeeper gestures to. Ooh. With such short notice and everyone recovering, I was unable to get your 20 dancing 50 men. However.
However, at the party, I've been promised that we have a special area set aside for you. Yes.
[00:25:50] Speaker D: The cypress hill dances.
[00:25:51] Speaker E: Yes.
Ooh. Proceeds to, like, say, where's my room?
[00:25:57] Speaker B: Direct me to my room, whatever rooms you would like. We've closed the entire inn down, so it's just you here. I will leave as well. If you need anything, please do not hesitate to write on this piece of paper. And it will let stripping off her.
[00:26:13] Speaker E: Clothes and, like, running to her room as she's doing it.
[00:26:18] Speaker D: What?
[00:26:19] Speaker B: All right, everyone gets a nice shot of half orcas as, ooh. Runs out of the room.
[00:26:26] Speaker C: Brianna will do the oop face and then kind of give Saraya a sideways glance to see how she feels about this.
[00:26:35] Speaker D: Soraya's just kind of doing that, like, head tilt, like, never seen those before.
[00:26:46] Speaker C: Anyway, she will also say to the innkeeper, we really appreciate it. You truly shouldn't have gone through so much trouble. This is truly magnificent. Thank you so much for hosting us.
[00:27:00] Speaker B: No trouble at all. No trouble at all. Again, I thank you so much for saving me and all of the leaders of the town and everyone on that boat. It's been really remarkable what you five have done for us. So thank you. Thank you so much.
[00:27:16] Speaker C: Of course, hopefully we will be able to read the town of this problem for good. We're gonna. We're gonna hang out here for a while. Is the. Is the hope.
[00:27:29] Speaker A: Yes. For a dare to rest? Yeah.
[00:27:31] Speaker C: Get our spells.
[00:27:32] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:27:33] Speaker B: Yeah. So they've. They've said rest for the night. It's about two in the afternoon. After everything is all said and done, they've. They've offered you. You can stay here as long as you like. However, they've said, please, at least stay tonight. And tomorrow we would love to host a party for. For you all. In fact, they insist on throwing you a party. And then after that, it is up to you. But you are always welcome here in.
[00:27:58] Speaker A: Just to refresh myself as well as anyone who is listening. The whole reason we're here is because that guy who. I think his name is Hubrick or Hoibik or something.
[00:28:12] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:28:12] Speaker A: Hubrick came to breachel and demanded us to help him or try to get us to help him, but told us that he was going to meet his boss. I think it was boss whose name escapes me again.
[00:28:29] Speaker B: Las Lynn.
[00:28:30] Speaker A: Yes. Laslin at sunset imports.
[00:28:33] Speaker B: Correct.
[00:28:34] Speaker A: So we came through the dream gate.
I'm not sure why we decided to do that. Went through the dream gate and ended up the dream dimension where we got fucked up by hags pretty good. Almost all died. But we managed to hold on and now we're here. Turns out somebody here again, Scarlet Triad. They are dealing with Laslyn as well. There's mentions of sunset imports again in Contago, which we assume is close.
[00:29:05] Speaker B: Yes. You saw a map you were very close to.
[00:29:08] Speaker A: So I guess our goal is to, once this little party is over, probably try to hitch a ride on a boat to Contago.
[00:29:21] Speaker D: That was my thought.
[00:29:22] Speaker A: Although who owns that boat outside now, right? That's what she said to Genie. Smile.
[00:29:25] Speaker E: Yes, that's mine.
[00:29:26] Speaker A: So once captain no pants is ready to ship off, I think we should probably head to Kentargo. But that's can wait. We can certainly.
There's nothing pressing that I'm aware of. We can certainly spend a day here recovering from being kicked in the chest really hard. You know, just enjoy ourselves for a minute before we get. Get on our way.
[00:29:50] Speaker B: So I just put a map up on your screens just so you guys can see.
Cypress point is west of Nidal and east of Contago.
[00:30:02] Speaker A: Okay, so we're just on the coast, it looks like.
[00:30:04] Speaker B: Yeah, you're at the. Yeah.
[00:30:06] Speaker D: So Kentucky is not far.
[00:30:08] Speaker B: No, no, not at all. You are a part. You're in Ravnul, which, you know, just came a free, free country from Nidal or broke away from Nidal and got their independence. That's kind of common knowledge. You're about, I'd say, 60 to 70 miles away from Contago. It's not gonna be a quick trip.
[00:30:32] Speaker D: I mean, it's literally the next notable set of one over.
[00:30:36] Speaker A: Yeah. I like how there's a place called cape dis on the western edge of the city that doesn't straight.
[00:30:42] Speaker D: I mean, it is right near dismal niche.
[00:30:45] Speaker A: Yeah. Like cape dis. I think they feel like they're serving up just, like, sick burns. Go cape disc to get some sick burns.
[00:30:53] Speaker D: I would also like to clarify that it is. I am not mispronouncing niche. It is literally n I t c h. Niche.
[00:30:58] Speaker A: Yeah. Dismal niche.
[00:30:59] Speaker D: That sounds so inviting, doesn't it?
[00:31:01] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:31:02] Speaker F: Who doesn't want to go horrible?
[00:31:05] Speaker A: But anyway, sure. So Twintalon will take him into sani, up to their suite, and begin to get cleaned up.
[00:31:13] Speaker D: Yeah. Saraya sinks gratefully into a bath, and Jasper flaps with her.
[00:31:20] Speaker B: As you all go up into your rooms, you notice that the. The closets have been outfitted with clean clothes of varying sizes and styles. A lot of them are nice clean. They're nice, clean clothes that you guys probably haven't had for a little bit a week a week or so. Yeah. So there's boots. There's all sorts of stuff in there.
[00:31:48] Speaker D: Hmm. Lovely. Nice, nice relaxing time.
[00:31:52] Speaker A: Yeah. So I said we get cleaned up and tomorrow's the party.
[00:31:55] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:31:57] Speaker A: Probably gonna get cleaned up, get some food in the stomach, and go to sleep in a bed.
[00:32:04] Speaker B: They've also taken one bed from one room and pushed it into a bed with the other room to make it a double wide bed. And, yeah, it's a remarkably comfortable evening for all of you.
[00:32:19] Speaker C: Well, after sleeping in the jungle.
[00:32:22] Speaker A: Right.
[00:32:22] Speaker C: That's exactly where we came from for so long.
[00:32:24] Speaker A: We did have some time back at home, and then we were in the dream gate for a little while, but that's true. Yeah, we've been getting. Our butts were pretty good for the last couple hours, I guess.
[00:32:35] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:32:35] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:32:36] Speaker B: You guys kind of got into the. Into town here at like, nine and 09:00 a.m. and from 09:00 a.m. to 02:00 p.m. you've basically been fighting.
[00:32:46] Speaker C: Yeah. Jeez wee.
[00:32:48] Speaker B: I mean, you fought everything. You fought demons, you fought, you know, slavers, dwarves.
[00:32:56] Speaker D: We fought everything, man. We fought everything.
[00:33:00] Speaker A: Oh, shit. I meant to look under that dude's eye patch, make sure he wasn't hiding anything under there.
[00:33:05] Speaker B: Uh, just a whole.
[00:33:07] Speaker A: Okay, just checking. Make sure you didn't have, like, two working eyes. Wasn't just like a douchebag with two working eyes.
[00:33:12] Speaker C: Or it just looks good with a die pad.
[00:33:15] Speaker F: Yeah.
[00:33:16] Speaker D: So Jasper makes disappointed crow noises.
[00:33:19] Speaker C: Tasty, tasty eyes. Yeah, yeah.
[00:33:21] Speaker D: He's hoping for a tasty, tasty eye. He only got one. It's a treat that comes in pairs.
[00:33:28] Speaker B: So as everyone is settling in for the eve, you hear what sounds like a struggle coming from knife swords room.
[00:33:38] Speaker F: No, no.
Get off of me. It's gonna eat me.
[00:33:43] Speaker B: No, no.
[00:33:45] Speaker C: I don't feel like Brina would be sleeping terribly well since she's had that weird sensation. I was gonna say that she probably meditated and tried to sleep, but kept at least a dagger under her pillow the whole night. And the minute she hears that, she's up and out and ready for a.
[00:34:06] Speaker B: Fight and you head into knife sword's room and there are three people holding him, trying to get him into the bath.
[00:34:16] Speaker D: Saraya, who only has to sleep for like 4 hours, is standing near the door and just. I paid them extra.
[00:34:22] Speaker F: Get him off.
[00:34:23] Speaker B: No.
[00:34:24] Speaker D: No.
[00:34:25] Speaker C: Oh, good.
[00:34:26] Speaker F: This is a defensive mechanism.
[00:34:28] Speaker E: Boo wakes up and she's like bleary eyed and she's just like stomping over to his room just here.
[00:34:35] Speaker C: Stop. Oh, no. We hooked the half work.
You know what? This is good. Thank you. We owe you a debt of service. Now, towns members, I'll remember this.
[00:34:50] Speaker B: You see them dunk knife sword under and start scrubbing him.
[00:34:54] Speaker D: They tried to refuse the payment at first. I told them if they changed their minds, the opera was still open. They took it fairly quickly, you see.
[00:35:02] Speaker B: Suddenly, you see knife sword bolt out of the bathroom of his room, covered in soap, and running down the hallway.
[00:35:13] Speaker C: Do I get an attack of opportunity to grab him?
[00:35:17] Speaker A: That's the point at which twintal comes out of his room, trying to figure out what's going on, and opens the door right into knife sword's path.
[00:35:23] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. And you just hear as a soaped up knife sword hits the door, slides up it a little bit, and then down. And the townsfolk apologize for waking you.
[00:35:36] Speaker A: It's when town guy brings his neck around the door, just watches, looks down like this.
[00:35:40] Speaker C: What just happened?
[00:35:41] Speaker A: The soaped up goblin on the floor, and then watches the town folk come and remove him.
[00:35:45] Speaker F: I will have my revenge.
[00:35:47] Speaker A: I will.
Don't forget to wash behind his. Everything okay?
[00:35:56] Speaker C: Oh, goodness.
[00:35:57] Speaker D: You might need four of you to brush his teeth, three to hold the mouth open and one to do the brushing.
[00:36:03] Speaker E: Ooh's just tired of all this noise. And she just, like, goes and grabs him, and she just puts him in the. In the bath and just starts teaching, taking a scrub and just, like, scrubbing him herself. Just, like, really vigorously, though, just, like, getting it done.
[00:36:17] Speaker F: Just.
[00:36:18] Speaker C: Well, at least you don't mind the smell. Thenu. Good on you.
[00:36:22] Speaker B: An hour later, knife sword has been taken out of the bathtub, toweled off, and his teeth are brushed, and he's just sitting there pouting, smelling pretty.
[00:36:37] Speaker A: I've never seen a goblin with a pompadour before.
[00:36:43] Speaker D: A gompador.
[00:36:44] Speaker C: A gompador, please. Anyone who wishes to draw. You know what?
[00:36:49] Speaker F: I'm gonna walk out of my room, down to Brianna's room, grab her backpack, walk back to my room, and climb into it.
[00:36:56] Speaker C: Hey.
[00:36:59] Speaker B: And with that, you all get a. A restful night's sleep. Even Saraya.
[00:37:06] Speaker D: Ah, no nightmares tonight.
[00:37:08] Speaker B: No nightmares tonight.
[00:37:10] Speaker C: Aw, that's good.
[00:37:12] Speaker D: Very cute.
[00:37:13] Speaker C: Very nice.
[00:37:14] Speaker D: Human Jasper is still just trying to figure out what blinking is like with only two items.
I'm gonna keep calling him human Jasper. It's elf Jasper.
[00:37:23] Speaker B: It is now the 25th of Rova. The next day, you all wake up, not super late in the afternoon, but, like, you all slept in. And as you wake up, you hear the sounds of the town. Very busy setting up this festival for you. Is there anything you guys would like to do in this downtime that you have? You have approximately one day worth of downtime. If there's any selling or anything like that, we can do that. We'll take care of it off air. But just let me know before the party starts.
[00:38:02] Speaker A: Twintal will mention to Brianna about the mithril ingots he found or mithril trunks that he found. Well, I found these on the boat when we were rescuing the captives.
I don't think you have time. I mean, your talent is not in question. I don't think we have time to make you a new suit of armor, but. But I do think that given the time, it would be worth your effort to make a suit of mithril full plate. It would lighten the armor that you have. Wouldn't slow you down as much.
[00:38:32] Speaker C: Let me have a look at that. Let me see what, what at least I can start preparations for. And see if I can borrow the local blacksmiths forge, even if I need to do it while we're traveling in our downtimes and the like, because I can do that.
[00:38:53] Speaker A: Okay. Okay. I don't know how much mithril you need. I don't. I don't have any concept of how much Mithril we have versus how much you would need to make full plate.
[00:39:03] Speaker C: But that is an excellent question. There has to be, like, blacksmithing rules, per.
[00:39:09] Speaker B: I'm sure some of the craft an item rule set that we'll have to look at, but we'll take a look at it between now and when you have enough time. But you can head down to the blacksmith and, you know, whatever you need to start doing, whether it's, like, melting it or tempering it, you can absolutely do that. Soraya. Christine, what would you like Soraya to do?
[00:39:32] Speaker D: I think she's wandering and just enjoying the. The weather and not, you know, not having had some nightmares last night. Definitely teaching Jasper how to, like, blend in and be, like, pass for a humanoid, especially speaking in full sentences and actually using hands, like, no, no, don't knock your mouth. You have thumbs now. Like that kind of thing. This is a little montage of her, like, with Jasper.
[00:40:05] Speaker B: Heidi, what is. Ooh, doing?
[00:40:07] Speaker E: I am imagining, like, a very lazy Sunday waking up and just, like, going to find some food, going to, like, get her rocks off and then just, like, getting her rocks off again. Like, just, like, going and finding different people to have fun with and drinking. Probably lots of that, too.
[00:40:28] Speaker B: So everywhere you go, you don't have to pay for food or drink. And this goes for all of you. The town is just so thankful that they are not, you know, being held captive and, you know, yes, there was some destruction done, but overall, the town is in very good shape. Like, they're just so thankful. So you managed to. You just have a nice, lazy day. Knife, sword. What are you.
[00:40:53] Speaker F: I'm not talking to any of you.
I'm gonna go sulk in a dark corner somewhere and eat my oranges whole, just.
[00:41:06] Speaker A: Without peeling them or anything. Just.
[00:41:08] Speaker F: You're supposed to peel them.
[00:41:10] Speaker A: Don't ever change.
[00:41:12] Speaker B: And, Matt, what is twin Talon doing after he hands off the ingots and the mythical.
[00:41:17] Speaker A: There's nothing really that twin Talon would. Has to do. So he probably would spend some time. Yeah, just hanging out with, ooh, taking in the, uh, the city, drinking, having a good time.
But, uh, yeah, so it. I don't know how often people have three barstools where it's half orc lady human manned pterodactyl, but we're gonna find out, I guess, since. Since Tisani is a human sized pterodactyl.
[00:41:50] Speaker B: So you hang out with, ooh, you guys have a lovely day. Sometimes oo disappears with a person for a little bit and then comes back and seems really relaxed.
As the day travels to night or dusk, you see that the town has got spared no expense. There's dancing lights everywhere, the spell lighting up the city, the town center. And there are tables put together, and there is a feast brought out, mostly fish, because it is a fishing village. But they are. There's every type of seafood that you could imagine. There's a roast boar. As you look at it a little closer, you realize that they've taken a couple of the blood bores that you guys dealt with, cleaned them up, and are now cooking them to celebrate. And it's just a lovely evening, a very lovely seaside dinner. Eventually, Jerlila steps up to a small podium and says, we here at Cypress Point would like to thank these brave heroes for freeing us from the clutches of the scarlet triad. It is with their bravery that we are able to sit here and celebrate tonight. I hope that their bravery has shone upon all of you, and you will all take their lessons in stride and learn from them. They were not greedy or unnecessarily rough with anything or any of us. They were very helpful and able to look upon their fellow people not as human or goblin or dwarf, but as a people all in all. And it is with their kindness and their love that they've helped us. So we, in turn, would like to offer you this wonderful feast that we have prepared. And in order to say thank you. And she kind of. There's a round of applause and she nods and she kind of steps away, starts to disappear off into the distance.
[00:44:03] Speaker C: Never to be seen again.
[00:44:05] Speaker A: No, she disappears in the distance. Like, where's she going?
[00:44:08] Speaker B: Like she just starts to walk away.
[00:44:10] Speaker D: Like, into the crowd or just like she's done party.
[00:44:13] Speaker B: Well, yes, both into the crowd. But like, you also see that she's kind of maneuvering to, like, leave the party.
[00:44:19] Speaker E: Is she hot?
[00:44:21] Speaker B: I mean, maybe I'm not here to judge for you. So she's in her late sixties.
Who doesn't discriminate? Very.
She's very sun worn. You can tell that she's lived here in an oceanside town for most of her life. You're not sure if she looks like she may have been a fisher person at some point, going out on the water and catching fish and crab and lobster and all sorts of delicious seafood. Thyme is a thing and has worn on her.
[00:44:57] Speaker E: Who's gonna run after her?
[00:44:58] Speaker B: It is not. The party is not just starting it. This is like, like the food has been served. Like the first round has been served of like a seven course meal. So, you know, there's, there's definitely more food coming and more celebration happening. But it's not like, oh, the party started, I did my speech and I'm gone. It's like she hung out. She did the appetizers, the past entrees, you know, like that, and then made her speech and now she's heading out.
[00:45:26] Speaker D: She's a little old lady. It's time for bed.
[00:45:28] Speaker B: Yeah, it could be that.
[00:45:30] Speaker A: So twin Talon now is catching whatever Brianna had, that suspicious tingling.
[00:45:36] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:45:36] Speaker A: And he is going to start really looking for something not specifically her. But this is the kind of thing to do if like, you had like, set a bomb at the place and you're like, let me make my speech and leave. And then, you know, in a couple minutes, it explodes and kills everyone or something. So twin Talon is going to start looking. Not like tearing people's tables apart or anything like that, but just really looking around, looking for anybody who seems to be acting suspiciously and looking for any signs of danger.
[00:46:06] Speaker B: Okay. Ooh. You catch up to her quite easily. It's not like she's hustling or anything like that. And what do you say?
[00:46:12] Speaker E: I was so enthralled by excellent speech, just thanking us and I just wanted to thank you for thanking us. And so I would like to buy you or get a drink with you. Can I get you something to drink? Let's get a drink.
[00:46:27] Speaker B: Oh, I would love to. However, I'm the only cleric in town, and I. I am headed to take care of those who were injured in the attack on the.
[00:46:40] Speaker E: That sounds terribly boring. Let me take you to my room.
[00:46:46] Speaker B: I would love to. However. She pats your hand. Desnas work is not done right now, and I need to go take.
[00:46:53] Speaker E: And I'm just gonna follow you. I hope you don't mind. We're just gonna have a lovely chat along the way. Maybe I can convince you. And she follows her.
[00:47:00] Speaker B: Okay. And she heads to the. The small chapel of Desna. As you walk in, and you see that there are, like, 15 or 20 people kind of laid up in there with various wounds. Some of them. Even though some of the captives on the boat did eat, that's. They're very malnourished. And she is indeed taken care of. Twin Talon, as you've searched, you don't really see anything of importance other than the fact that knife sort of, like, took a plate of food and then left and is now walking along the beach. Like, you can see him in the distance.
[00:47:41] Speaker A: Oh, he's gonna get killed by seagulls.
So as they are there, Twittalan sees that, so he's gonna go to Brianna. He says, um, I'm starting to feel like something's wrong, but I can't put my finger on it. I'm gonna go knife swords by himself. So I'm gonna go check on him to make sure he's okay. I think. Ooh. Went off with the. The mayor or whoever she is. But I just wanna let you know where I'm going in case something happens and I disappear.
I'm going to the beach.
[00:48:14] Speaker C: I want to believe that it is us being extra cautious after everything we've been through, but I. I understand. I will be here.
[00:48:24] Speaker D: I will.
[00:48:25] Speaker C: I'll keep an eye, and should anything untoward happen, I'll send for you.
[00:48:29] Speaker A: Okay. I just mean, like, if I get murdered, you know where I went.
[00:48:33] Speaker C: No. No, I won't. I won't look for you. You will look for me. That's what we're doing, right? That's what we're talking.
[00:48:39] Speaker A: Sure. We'll just look for each other.
[00:48:41] Speaker C: Okay, cool. Good. Okay, good talk.
[00:48:45] Speaker A: And twin town will head off to check on knife sword.
[00:48:49] Speaker B: Great. Brianna and Saraya. Soraya, what are you planning on doing?
[00:48:53] Speaker D: She's kind of been milling around.
People skills still aren't entirely her thing.
[00:49:00] Speaker B: So as you are milling around, people are thanking you profusely.
[00:49:04] Speaker D: Just, you know, being as gracious as you can about it.
Does it seem odd in any way?
[00:49:12] Speaker B: No. Not that you've noticed.
[00:49:14] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:49:15] Speaker B: You and Brianna meet up again. And as you meet up, you see a group of people is starting to kind of surround you and begging to hear stories of your exploits.
[00:49:27] Speaker C: Well, Shreya, you're a far better storyteller and far more charming than I am.
[00:49:33] Speaker D: Oh, I was just going to say the same thing about you.
[00:49:39] Speaker C: I'm not a terribly good storyteller. There are times that I wish silver was still here to tell these fine.
[00:49:47] Speaker D: People, to share these tales.
[00:49:51] Speaker C: But there was this time when we were dealing with these people up in trees and twin Talon, you see, managed to dispatch all of them. Let me tell you how how you find out. This is listening to episode.
Yes.
[00:50:17] Speaker B: So you regale them with stories of your past exploits and everyone claps and enjoys it. A few minutes after you're after the stories have finished and you've been brought another mug of ale or wine, depending on what you want, and another giant plate of heaping food, a very light skinned man approaches you and nods.
This man is. This man is very lanky. Is a sallow man with elongated ears and unusually dark green eyes.
As he talks to you, he introduces himself. He says, hello, I am Halaka Shadeborn.
[00:51:06] Speaker D: Can I roll elven lore to see if I recognize what heritage he is?
[00:51:11] Speaker B: Sure.
[00:51:12] Speaker C: Should I roll preach the lore?
[00:51:16] Speaker D: 28.
[00:51:17] Speaker B: He is not of elven ancestry.
[00:51:21] Speaker D: Interesting.
[00:51:21] Speaker C: Well met, Mister Shadeborn. How can we be of service?
[00:51:27] Speaker B: First off, I want to say thank you. I was in the smokehouse when you rescued everyone and I very much appreciate it. And as he's talking, you see him take a finger and run it softly down the side of his jawline.
[00:51:41] Speaker C: His own jawline?
[00:51:43] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:51:43] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:51:45] Speaker B: I am a representative of the umbral court in Nadal. I was on my way to Kentargo to speak with the city's ruling silver council when I was captured here.
I'm going to be heading off there soon, but I would very much like not to be. And he looks like he's struggling for words.
Apprehended again. And if you wouldn't? If you were so inclined, I'd be. The entire court of Nidal would be very inclined to pay you handsomely for guarding me.
[00:52:24] Speaker C: As he's saying this. What can I roll to know more about the umbral court?
[00:52:32] Speaker D: I have schooled secrets.
Sorry not to cut you off, Haya.
You notice signs and symbols that members of mystery cult and other secret societies used to declare their affiliation. So I can use occultism instead of diplomacy to gather information, can I? Like, see if, like, that motion he did or anything was significant?
[00:52:51] Speaker B: Give me that role. And, yes, the umbral court would be society.
[00:52:57] Speaker C: Not that I have anything.
[00:52:59] Speaker D: Yeah, I have 19 for the occultism trick.
[00:53:04] Speaker C: And I have the 17 for society.
[00:53:08] Speaker B: All right, great. Twintalen, you approach knife sword, walking quietly along the beach, kind of swaying.
[00:53:17] Speaker A: Okay. Hey, buddy.
[00:53:19] Speaker F: Go away.
[00:53:20] Speaker A: Just wanna make sure you're okay. You're out here by yourself on the. On the seashore.
[00:53:24] Speaker F: Just. Just go away. I don't know enough.
[00:53:28] Speaker A: You don't know enough about what?
[00:53:29] Speaker F: Everything.
[00:53:31] Speaker A: Well, I mean, nobody knows that much about everything.
[00:53:34] Speaker F: Yeah, but you weren't raised in a garbage heap.
[00:53:36] Speaker A: That's true. That's true.
[00:53:38] Speaker F: Yeah. I thought I knew it all, but now I realize I know nothing. I thought, sure, the world's a little bigger than the garbage heap, but.
[00:53:46] Speaker A: No, yeah, I mean, the world. The world. The whole world's a pretty big place.
[00:53:52] Speaker F: I just. I make mistakes all the time. I don't understand things.
[00:53:56] Speaker C: No.
[00:53:58] Speaker F: So, yeah, I don't know. I just need to think.
[00:54:02] Speaker A: Okay, well, just so you know, pal, I mean, I don't know if it's more or less comforting, but the world's a big place. I mean, and it's a place that's small and compared to everything. If you look up at night and you see all those stars that Desna put up there, but nobody really knows anything. Not really. We know a little bit. We're good at some things. And even then, you think you're good at something. And then you find someone who's even better at it. But it doesn't mean that you're not a value or that you should stop trying. There's always more. Everybody can learn.
[00:54:43] Speaker F: Uh. I'm tired of being. Being wrong about everything.
[00:54:48] Speaker A: Okay.
That's definitely a goal. What's, uh. What's the first. What's the first stop of your plan?
[00:54:53] Speaker F: I'm gonna know everything.
I'm gonna find out what this thing is. And he holds up, um. Wooden spork.
[00:55:00] Speaker A: Ah.
Did you take that from the party?
[00:55:04] Speaker F: I mean, sorta.
[00:55:06] Speaker A: So. That is a very devious invention. See, you've seen a spoon before, right?
[00:55:14] Speaker F: Oh, I get it. It's for picking up bugs.
[00:55:17] Speaker A: I mean, you could use it for that.
[00:55:19] Speaker F: Especially ones that are, like, burrowing into your b. Yeah. He starts using it like a back scratcher.
[00:55:24] Speaker A: Just know that just because something has one intended purpose doesn't mean that's all it's good for.
[00:55:29] Speaker F: There's more.
[00:55:30] Speaker A: Oh. Oh, my friend. Have you ever had mashed potatoes?
[00:55:35] Speaker F: I've had mashed potatoes things before, but I'm not sure what a potato is. See what I mean? I don't know. Nothing.
[00:55:43] Speaker A: That's alright, buddy. Just stick with sauce.
[00:55:45] Speaker F: I mean, potatoes are probably so common. You use them for shoes?
[00:55:49] Speaker A: No, can't say we do.
[00:55:52] Speaker F: I mean, I just found out what a shoe was like yesterday.
[00:55:55] Speaker A: But.
But you wear shoes.
[00:55:58] Speaker F: I. I just. I just thought they were footbeds.
[00:56:03] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:56:04] Speaker F: Everybody kept saying shoo, and I was like, oh, maybe they're just, like, really confident about what they're talking about. It's like a shoe thing, you know? And then. Yeah, I suddenly realized that that was what they were talking about.
[00:56:15] Speaker A: All right, well, see, you're smarter already.
[00:56:18] Speaker C: He's good at context clues. That's what he's good at.
[00:56:21] Speaker F: I'm gonna. I'm gonna know everything. No more. I'm not gonna be wrong anymore. And he just sort of, like, keels over in, like, a stupor.
[00:56:31] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:56:32] Speaker F: Face first in the sand.
[00:56:34] Speaker A: All right? Twintown's gonna turn him on his side so it doesn't suffocate.
[00:56:37] Speaker B: All right? And then we're gonna cut over to. Ooh. Ooh. You've been watching this older lady practice her healing arts, and you watch people who have been. Who are wasting away from starvation. Slowly, you begin to start to regain their color and feel. Look happier and more like themselves.
[00:57:02] Speaker E: Well, this was not the way I thought my evening was gonna go.
I'm just gonna go back to the party if we ain't gonna party ourselves.
[00:57:15] Speaker B: She reaches out gently and touches your arm. Were this another time, I did not have so many injured people around. Perhaps things would have been different. But alas, the calling of the. Of a cleric is very rarely done.
[00:57:32] Speaker E: Time to hit the dusty trail. And she leaves.
[00:57:37] Speaker B: Okay, as you head back, you see that one of the people who kind of has been, like, directing the servers and whatnot approaches you, and they are very winded. Oh, uh, miss oo. That. That's you, correct? That's me. Um. Uh, yes, I was told to have a tent set aside for you.
Um, they look. They've. Their. Their cheeks flush red. It's best for you to let me just show you. And they. They rush you over to a tent, and there's 15 gentlemen, ladies. A mixture of both.
[00:58:23] Speaker D: It's my birthday.
[00:58:25] Speaker E: She's like shaking her shisha around.
[00:58:31] Speaker B: The ranging in all different ancestries and just.
[00:58:37] Speaker E: Like rips off her clothes and just, and just like, does a cartoon dive, like right into the middle of a pile.
[00:58:44] Speaker B: And then we fade to black as we see the tent just start shaking violently.
[00:58:51] Speaker C: Geez, when did we start playing dragon age, guys?
[00:59:00] Speaker B: And with that, we will learn about the umbral court next week.
[00:59:06] Speaker C: Man, I guess someone's having fun.
[00:59:14] Speaker F: Who'S.
[00:59:14] Speaker D: Having like, the time of her life this morning, tied up in a closet. Now I got me a whole bunch of boys and girls.
[00:59:24] Speaker A: Wait, is there like a, is there a wheel with, like, tickets on it with numbers on them set outside that tenta?
[00:59:34] Speaker B: Yeesh.
[00:59:35] Speaker A: Now serving number 42.
[00:59:38] Speaker B: Thank you for listening to the Crack Die podcast. Background sound effects provided by sirenscape because Epic Games deserve epic music. Please visit
[email protected] Pathfinder second edition, Age of Ashes, adventure path are all copyright of Paizo Publishing. Please, please visit
[email protected] for more information.
